martedì 30 gennaio 2007

Guerre Stellari VS il Signore degli Anelli


thnx to Pakopakko e Olmo


in Clerks2 c'è una buona scena, forse l'unica, in cui 2 ragazzi manca poco che si ammazzano di botte per stabilire se è meglio la trilogia di Guerre Stellari o quella del Signore degli Anelli.
geniale.

e quindi niente quando 'sti due piciu finiscono di litigare gli faccio, alla mia pupa, Tu di che ballotta sei? guerrestellari o ilsignoredeglianelli?
- Tutteddue, fa lei
No. no dico, ti piace di più guerrestellari o ilsignoredeglianelli?
- Tutteddue, fa lei, E' uguale
...no dai scusa amore non scherzare tifi per Solo o per Frodo?
- Tutteddue, mi piacciono tutteddue
a me cominciano a girarmi i coglioni.
no, perchè Non è possibile dico io. deciditi.
o sei per guerrestellari, la più grande saga mai esistita, o sei dalla parte di quei boriosi nani del cazzo che cercano un nonsocosa.
- Tutteddue, fa lei. come libro, è più bello il signore degli anelli che lo ha scritto Tolkien.
'cazzo c'entra Tolkien dico io. é morto.
è morto il 2 settembre 1973 a Bournemouth che non so neppure dove cazzo sia, Bournemouth.
- ma Tolkien era un genio, l'hai letta la saga? fa lei
'cazzo c'entra L'hai letta. Il Film dico. parliamo di film.
te, ti piace di più guerrestellari o ilsignoredeglianelli?
- Tutteddue, è che Tolkien ha scritto un capolavoro, guerrestellari invece, te non sai mica chi l'ha scritto no?
A parte il fatto, dico io, che la saga scritta sarà un capolavoro ma la trilogia filmica fa schifo... eppoi Si che lo so, guerrestelalri l'ha scritto Alan Dean Foster per conto di George Lucas, dopo che ne aveva scritto (lui Lucas) la sceneggiatura. per forza non è un capolavoro il libro.
quindi Film, parliamo di film.
ilsignoredeglianelli è un libro. un libro portato a film.
come film fa schifo, come film. per forza dico, è un libro.
invece guerrestellari è un film.
quindi come film è un capolavoro, perchè non è un libro, è un film. il libro lo han fatto dopo perchè Lucas doveva pagare la lavanderia a Chewbacca.
quindi povero Tolkien mi fa pure tenerezza, non è che ce l'ho con lui, ma Film, se parliamo di film, guerrestellari è più bello.
guerrestellari è un capolavoro insormontabile, ilsignoredeglianelli fa schifo.
come film.
che te lo sai che cosa ha fatto quel regista lì del signoredeglianelli prima di fare ilsignoredeglianelli?
ha fatto Bad Taste.
un capolavoro del cinema splatter.
1987, un cult. uno stracult.
questa dritta me l'ha data un mio amico cuoco, che io lo sapevo mica.

che questo Peter Jackson per me se restava a fare B-movie rimaneva uno dei più grandi di sempre (un po' come Neffa coi Negazione), invece con tutta 'sta prosopopea barocca ridondante (buona la prosopopea barocca ridondante!), dico, con tutta 'sta prosopopea barocca ridondante Jackson mi viene a noia, eppoi non può competere con George Lucas. c'ha le astronavi, Lucas. Jackson c'ha i nani.
ora, in tutta sincerità, come Film, come possono competere dei cazzo di nani con le astronavi? lascia stare i ribelli, la repubblica e tutto il resto, l'impero, la morte nera, i cavalieri Jedi.... ma tu prendi anche solo le astronavi di Lucas contro i nani di Jackson...va da sè.
quindi sui libri non discuto, ma se parliamo di Film, film è più bello guerrestellari.
riassunto, Semplice, perchè guerrestellari è un film portato a libro, ilsignoredeglianelli è un libro portato a film, quindi gioco forza, come Film, è più bello un film che un libro. come Film.
- che poi, mi fa lei, Te la trilogia di guerrestellari l'hai pure letta, oltre a sapere l'autore?
l'ho letta la trilogia. mi son fermato un po' prima della fine.
cioè mi son fermato a quando la principessa Leila si china su C1-P8 per lasciargli il messaggio.
ho letto questo. segue citazione.
"China su di lui era - era arduo persino per i suoi fotorecettori cibernetici riuscire a penetrare in quella vischiosa e acre cortina di fumo - una figura umana."
ho riletto questa frase 4 volte.
fa schifo al cazzo. pure se la scomponi e la ricomponi isolandone l'inciso. fa schifo.
China era su di lui una figura umana. ed era arduo persino per i suoi fotorecettori cibernetici riuscire a penetrare in quella vischiosa e acre cortina di fumo.
Chewbecca, che brutta frase!
così niente, mi son girati i coglioni che faceva schifo e ho chiuso la trilogia. pagina 9 arrivederci e grazie.
che ho pure guardato su internet che questo Foster non fosse mica qualche cugino di Lucas.
però Film, se mi parli di film vince guerrestellari.

83 commenti:

lulù ha detto...

ciao, sono una nuova arrivata, mi chiamo lulù e questo blog mi piace tantissimo, arguto!

consiglio a tutti gli amanti e le amanti del cinema famolo strano questo simpatico link
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un grosso bacio a tutti!

Ru ha detto...

...sentito?
sono arguto!
ora vado dilà allo specchio e me lo dico.
come sei arguto!

link controllato e consigliato, anche se sento puzza del dottor Reuben.

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Anonimo ha detto...

Bene ragazzi, ci risiamo co sto spam del cazzo!

Arguto,siamo nelle tue gracili mani,aiutaci te!

tribal

lulù ha detto...

sembra che arguto sia diventato ormai il tuo soprannome preferito!
invece volevo chiedere: cosa significa RU?
..è una sigla?
R.U. ragazzo umano
R.U. Reuben Umberto
..un'abbreviazione?
RUtto
RUmoroso
RUllante

Anonimo ha detto...

ahahahaha RUtto RUtto!!!!

di oboe ha detto...

Caro Ru,
esistono due tipi di uomini, quelli che hanno il fucile e quelli che scavano...
"Guerrestellari" ha il fucile...quindi "il Signore degli anelli" scava!
Che la forza sia con te giovane Jedi.
Fa

Anonimo ha detto...

Caro Oboe, posso aggiungere quello che diceva Toto' in merito al genere umano?

che ci sono due tipi...gli UOMINI e i CAPORALI....e finke' vivranno...come dici te,uno scaverà e gli altri useranno il fucile senza sprecarsi troppo.

end
TT

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ma chista lulu è mascio o fimmina?

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MA CHE TAYO DI BLOG,RU!!
AHAHAHAH!!
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Maschio colla EMME maiuscola sono!
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CIAO ARGUTO,QUI ASSENZE.MI STO DISPERDENDO NELL'ETERE MA NON SONO ANCORA UNO JEDI.SONO A FAVORE DI GUERRE STELLARI,PERò, SE SI PARLA DI PELLY. DI COSA SI PARLA?NON RICORDO PIù BENE.
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triskel ha detto...

Bravo Ru!
Guerre stellari, io sono per guerre stellari!!!
Arguto...m'immagino mentre te lo dici di fronte allo specchio...

Anonimo ha detto...

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Anonimo ha detto...

come cazzo si fa a dire che IL SIGNORE DEGLI ANELLI fa schifo?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????'
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